Complulsive Traveling
Or "Depressed in Egypt": the post.
Do you enjoy traveling? Is it an unforgettable adventure and a way to wallow in overwhelming emotions for a while to you? Have you tried not to? Have you tried using it as an expensive as fuck and barely helpful coping mechanism for your mental issues?
Here, I have a few tips for you.
Never plan ahead. Go to a country having no clue what's the language is spoken there, which currency is used, without map and a paid roaming-compatible celluar plan. Don't research anything and don't order tours. Trying to figure out things in hurry and immediately on place is a real excercise that will make you forget stuff in your head for a while.
Always go for hostels instead of the hotel. Partly because it's cheaper, but even if you aren't short on money, it gets overwhelmingly lonely in an empty room real quick and you will want to say kiss goodbye to the world even more than ever before. Most of the hostels, on the other hand, are designed to literally shove social interaction down your throat regardless of your own state of approachability, which helps maintaining your sanity enormously.
Don't book sightseeing tours, don't stick to predesigned tourist routes and experiences. Partly because it's boring: everybody else is also doing the same thing, what's the purpose of you repeating exactly same steps after millions of people who've been there before you? Go for a hike without a map, navigator, or anything planned in advance.
Hop on public transportation system and just look in the window. Head randomly and purposefully wherever you feel like to. Bum around. Chances are, you will get to see the real thing. The city through the eyes of the locals that experience it every single day. Chances are, you'll fucking hate it and will never want to return (what's up, Budapest?). But at least, post-trip depression will not hit you even harder upon returning to your place.
Express yourself. If you are concerned about your own safety (as you should be), research safety index of the place you are visiting beforehand, but I assume you are like me, dead inside already and don't ming doing reckless shit just to feel something for a moment. Being completely on your own in random destination is a perfect opportunity to be who you are. You will not see any of these people ever again unless you like each other and exchange contacts, so feel fucking free to do and tell whatever.
Wanted to cry in public and throw up a scene even though you are 2m tall bearded lumberjack? Do it. Wanted to approach random people on the street with your idea of establishing communism or whatever? If you speak the language, do it. Wanted to wear something in particular but haven't really built up the courage to show off on your workplace or similar? There is no better chance than now.
I highly discourage you of behaving like a dick and making other people's life harder for no reason (such as: littering, bullying service workers, refusing to pay for a service etc.) but at the end of the day, you do you. Who am I to stop you. Others may, though.
If something illegal in your area is legal here, by all means try it out. Even if you are not a big fun of, paying for a prostitute service with a credit card and glancing on her recent HIV-status check hanging on the wall is a thrilling experience on its own.
Go out late night. Two sides of the city for the price of one is absolutely guaranteed. Be ready for a first in your life (or maybe not?) panic attack if unlucky.
If you can afford to stay longer (remote work, joblessness, or a Hobo lifestyle in general), build a full cycle of chores and see if you can live like this indefinitely. Find out where and how to eat, groom yourself, wash yourself, do a laundry, update your disposables, masturbate, etc.
That again, will keep you occupied leaving not a lot of time for obtrusive thoughts, but what's really important, feeling completely detached from anything and self-sufficient on your own is the ultimate blessing nothing in this life ever comes close to.
And talk to a therapist if you are able to find a decent one. For fucks sake.